Princess Butterpeach Cinderella Von Hyatt-Gainsborough
The Princess of Aldea, and a rez junkie
A beautiful and graceful woman of refinement and dignity. She is as delicate as a bouquet of flowers made out of whispers, and as comely as a stripper in a wedding dress.
The once glorious princess of Aldea, Princess Butterpeach was easily the most powerful Princess of Aldean history, if not THE most powerful Princess (a title bestowed upon her after defeating Princess Jasmine of Disney’s Aladdin in a combination slap-fight/dance off/fighter jet duel). However, when the Elves invaded Aldea at the beginning of the war, Butterpeach was slain (and subsequently resurrected) 4 different times, dropping her level from a towering 20 down to a mediocre 16.
Since then, she has served as the acting leader of the Resistance. During this time, she has died a grand total of twelve times, causing her level to be reduced to a meager 4. Butterpeach blames her “survival-challenged” condition (the people of Aldea are famously politically correct) on the fact that her kingdom doesn’t have a concept of HP, and claims it would be almost impossible for her to make a toughness save against the weapons wielded by the Elves. In reality, this is probably just an excuse meant to cover her inadequacy as a leader.
In fact, the Princess is such an incapable leader that she is actually just a figurehead maintained by the real leader of the Resistance, her talking cat companion, Moona. Moona keeps Butterpeach on as the leader in order to maintain an element of surprise to play against the Elves, and in order to keep himself safe from their assaults- after all, as long as they keeping killing Butterpeach and she keeps coming back to life, he is effectively untouchable.
Aside from her shortcomings, Butterpeach is a kindhearted and compassionate girl, if not irredeemably stupid. She loves all things that are beautiful (except for elves, for well… obvious reasons), and enjoys using her healing powers and magical prowess to grow beautiful flowers and live in harmony with all the beasts of the forest. She also enjoys failing saves at crucial times, suffering from low blood pressure, and losing critical grapple checks to avoid being taken hostage. It is also rumored that she is sexually aroused by being kept at zero or lower HP, but she has dismissed this statement as “shameless tabloid gossip.”
In the first episode, she begged to accompany the party to Eberron, claiming it was a princess’s duty to serve as a beacon of hope to the lost soldiers of the war. She was left behind, but showed up in a rain of rose petals during the battle with Lady Gator and company. She used a scroll to cast Flame Strike, hitting Jeffiroth, the Cat, Justice Cat, and Bathsheba. This caused Jeffiroth to be dropped to critical HP, which allowed him to use his Limit Break on the Princess, killing her soundly. She was later revived by Gilda Arhamboras, but she lost a hit dice when the witch consumed it in exchange for her services.
After her nineteenth death, her remains were acquired by Empress Mialee.
The NINETEEN Deaths of Princess Butterpeach- Newly Updated!
- Death 1- Slain when a swarm of Drizzts stormed Blue Rose Castle.
- Death 2- Lucky critical hit scored by Galadriel in the Battle of Swan Lake.
- Death 3- Sacrificed her life-force to resurrect her four handmaidens and defeat Arwen on Aldea’s North Pole.
- Death 4- Impaled on a massive katana seemingly at random by a guy named Jeffiroth while praying for victory over Empress Mialee inside an as-of-yet-unexplained giant seashell.
- Death 5- Terminal stage mummy rot.
- Death 6- Accidentally drank potion of painless death while orchestrating liberation effort in the Somehow-still-not-as-depressing-as-Dark Sun-Campaign-Setting City of Ghostwalk.
- Death 7- REALLY unfortunate critical miss while wielding +5 vorpal halberd.
- Death 8- FREE SPACE!!!
- Death 9- Stung by a honeybee and went into anaphylactic shock.
- Death 10- Swallowed by the Tarrasque.
- Death 11- Accidentally wished back to life while still WITHIN the Tarrasque, died again.
- Death 12- Murdered while making a guest spot on The Order of the Stick, after suggesting a brand of depilatory cream to Belkar.
- Death 13- Attempted to hold authority in the presence of men while adventuring in Al-Qadim.
- Death 14- Delayed fireball in toilet tank.
- Death 15- Suspiciously committed suicide after asking Ialdabode to introduce her to Dionne Warwick.
- Death 16- Played Gin Rummy with Deck of Many Things.
- Death 17- Wound up on wrong side of a Limit Break powered Time Stands Still, naming “weight” as the effective STR score.
- Death 18- Left standing on a pressure sensitive switch in the Keebler Tower, burned alive when the tower “mysteriously” burnt down.
- Death 19- Eaten alive by Dame Unagi.